Thursday, November 11, 2010

I'm A Lucky Girl . . .

Do you actually realize all the wonders of the inter net? Just in todays mail I got tons of free gifts. They include:

  • All my Christmas gifts paid for

  • I get to pay less than half the taxes I owe (gosh, I think we already paid them)

  • An extension on my warranty (I don't think I have any warranties)

  • My next car "the car of my dreams" below actual cost

  • Two Jet-Blu airline tickets

  • Better breasts

  • Penis enhancement

  • I'm a lottery winner

  • Unclaimed assets in my name

  • Disability benefits

  • Jennie is interested in me (come on . . . I'm a g.i.r.l.)

  • I have 5 "FlirtVites"

  • Lucky me--I'm going to Vegas

  • All the VIAGRA I could ever want---wooo-hooo--what a weekend this is going to be (I think I'll take it to Vegas with me)

  • A free I-phone

  • A superprize notification from Publisher's Clearing House

How did we ever live without the inter net?


Anonymous said...

That is funny!!

Mashell said...

You ARE a lucky girl.

Merrill McCracken said...

You are so lucky. I too recently acquired some wealth on the internet. Yes it seems a King Lear of the country of Botswana needed help getting some money out of the hands of his evil government. He just needed an American ally with a bank account. He had heard about me and how honest I was through mutual acquaintances. He said if I would send him a cashiers check for $700 along with my bank account information, he could have his wealth (approximately $1.2 million) transferred here to my bank account. After that he would come to this country and split the money with me. Since I sent the cashiers check 7 months ago I am still waiting. I check my bank account every day and I'm sure it will come in any time now. I’m so excited. I just keep thinking about what I’m going to do with the money.

Amber said...

Your a dork!